A 'sustainability' theme with a little bit of vintage & some rustic tones

As our loyal readers know, at The Wedding Gurus we love to celebrate those who take a chance and do things a little 'differently'. We love to bring you inspiring pictures and ideas of those who have been courageous enough to try something unique and have pulled it off fabulously.

Vintage themes are definitely a popular choice with couples and wedding stylists and our readers are always on the look out for interesting and inspiring ideas, but the wedding we are bringing you today was much more than simply vintage it carried the theme of 'sustainability'.

The wedding of Leah and Mawson was held in the gorgeous Adelaide Hills town of Woodside  -approximately 38km's south-east of Adelaide City, at Bird in Hand winery.

Take a look at the wonderful ways they have recycled, reused and incorporated produce to create an amazing and fresh look.

Leah's dress was by local designer Caleche Bridal (Norwood), although Leah herself designed the sleeves of the vintage inspired dress.

 Leah spent many months collecting individual recyclable pieces including some pictured below

With the stark contrast of the background against the lucious green lawn and vegetation of the property, this was the perfect setting for a natural look

Some of the local wildlife also managed to steal a small piece of the spotlight

The uniquely brilliant and delicious cake was made out of layers of gourmet cheese.

These arrangements were an assortment of local wild flowers and plants

The couple actually grew all of the herbs that were beautifully placed on the tables with great effect and added to this were lemons and limes for the guests to take home.

The cheeseboards pictured above were actually made by the brides father from old wine barrells in an effort to promote recycling ideas. 

 

These completely cute wooden pegs were used as place settings and the whole scene set amongst the wine barrels with splashes of green herbs and colourful fruit was a sustainability fans dream.

Heirloom seeds were even given to the guests as gifts on the table 

We hope that some of these great and unique ideas have inspired you to think outside the box when it comes to your own wedding. Leah and Mawson have certainly gone to great lengths to create a reception that truly represents who they are and what they believe in and which hopefully reminds us, even just a little to remember what is important to us when it comes to planning our big day.

The Wedding Gurus

xxxx

Week 25 - 52 Rituals/Traditions in 52 Weeks

A Fishy Korean Ritual/Tradition

Now if your looking for something out of the ordinary, then this one is for you!

In this Korean tradition the poor groom is subjected to some pretty interesting antics. Usually done in the spirit of providing him with increased strength for the wedding night, this ritual begins after the main ceremony. The Groom’s ‘friends’ (using the term loosely) will tie his ankles together with rope then take of his socks in order to beat the soles of his feet with a fish – A Yellow Corvina.

Pic From: bluedragon.en.ec21.com

Odd? Yes a little, but it is all done in the spirit of good will and as a fun gesture of friendship so who are we to judge.

We just love these strange and out there rituals/ideas, so if you know of any you would like us to use, please feel free to drop us a line on the contact page.

The Wedding Gurus

xxx

Week 24 - 52 Rituals/Traditions in 52 Weeks - Wishing Stones

The Wishing Stone Ceremony

The ‘Wishing Stone' Ceremony is a wonderfully inclusive ritual to incorporate into your big day and is great for not just weddings, but any ceremony you may be considering.

I have performed it as part of a baby naming as well as for weddings. It basically involves using small polished stones, just large enough to write a small wish on if necessary.

Photo from: Intimateweddings.com

 Usually the stones are given out by someone selected to perform the task (can be a great way of including children, by getting them to walk around and make sure everyone has a stone).

As the ceremony commences the guests are asked to hold the stones tightly and make a loving wish for the couple’s life together.

The stones can later be collected in a vase for the couple to keep as a momento of all of the wishes their loved ones and friends made for them or each person can be invited to come forward as part of the ceremony and place their stone – making their wish for the couple, in the vase.

Each stone represents a special wish that the couple can take with them to reflect on throughout their married life together.

Some couples may wish to go a little further and ask guests to write their wish on the stone, offering felt tipped pens for the guests and family to write their names and add their wish.

Week 23 - 52 Rituals/Traditions in 52 Weeks

Acknowledgement of the traditional owners of the land

I thought I might share this with you as I have been on occassion asked to begin a ceremony with an acknowledgement of the traditional owners of the land upon which we have stood.

An acknowledgement is a great way of paying respect to those who have come before us and can be done whether or not you have an indigenous background. The two examples here are from one particular area, using specific groups, but wherever you are in the world, you can easily use similar wording to pay respect and honour the traditional owners of the land on which you stand.

It is believed that paying tribute brings good luck by ensuring that you are beginning on a positive note.

http://www.australiangeographic.com.au/assets/images/article/journal/7610/ayers-rock-uluru-nt.jpg

 

“We acknowledge and respect the traditional custodians whose ancestral lands we are meeting upon here today. We acknowledge the deep feelings of attachment and relationship of Aboriginal peoples to country. We also pay respects to the cultural authority of Aboriginal peoples visiting/attending from other areas of South Australia/Australia present here.”

OR

“We would like to acknowledge this land that we meet on today is the traditional lands of the Kaurna people and that we respect their spiritual relationship with their country. We also acknowledge the Kaurna people as the custodians of the greater Adelaide region and that their cultural and heritage beliefs are still important to the living Kaurna people today.”

If you are thinking of adding something like this to your ceremony, or are assisting a couple who would like to have something similar included, be sure to check the details of the traditional owners of the land that you will be performing the ceremony on.

Also check out one of our previous rituals/traditions - a traditional smoking ceremony.

The Wedding Gurus

Week 21: Silent Flower Ritual

Welcome to week 21 of our "52 traditions/rituals in 52 weeks".

The silent flower ritual is one of the simplest and most basic rituals that may be included in a wedding ceremony, but it’s significance and emotional depth are long remembered.

The silent flower ritual brings significance to the roles of the mothers on this special day, that may otherwise go unspoken and to all that they have contributed in the lives of the couple present. In nurturing, loving and caring for each of them and in being there to share this special day with them.

Once the guests are assembled and the groom and celebrant are waiting for the bride, the entrance music begins and the bride enters carrying her bouquet with 2 loose long stem flowers. As she approaches her groom on her father’s (or whoever is escorting her) arm, she lets go of him and walks silently over to her soon to be mother in law and hands her one of the flowers, giving her a kiss on the cheek. She then walks over to her own mother handing her a flower also and giving her a kiss on the cheek.

No words are said during the ritual and the bride then returns to her escort’s arm and continues to her groom.

The ritual, though silent, is very meaningful and brings a tear to the eyes of guests and of course the mothers.  It is a truly wonderful way of honouring the mothers role in the lives of the couple and their importance on this day. The mothers are always very pleased, particularly when they are not aware that it is going to take place.

The Wedding Gurus

xxx

For other ways to include your mums please see our post "What about the Mothers?"

Week 17 - Earth Ritual

Welcome to week 17 in our ’52 Rituals/Traditions in 52 Weeks’

Many wedding rituals and traditions have a strong focus on the bride and groom and where appropriate, their children. These rituals seek to show the significance and beauty in bringing two individuals together or in uniting a couple and their children whether from previous relationships or their own.

The ritual we are sharing with you today does this, but it goes a little further by involving all of the family and friends in attendance. They not only take part, but are asked to contribute and it is this contribution that sets the foundation for the ritual.

When you send out your wedding invitations you will need to include a small note asking each guest to bring a small jar or container filled with some dirt from around their home. (It only needs to be a small amount especially if you have a lot of guests coming.)

At the ceremony have a medium sized plant pot and a seedling ready on a nearby table. At the time in the ceremony when the ritual is to be done, the officiant may say something (and this is just our preferred version of the wording) such as:

"Bride(name) & Groom(name) have chosen to include a special ritual in their ceremony today that involves you all as their loved ones – the people that they hold most dear.

Each of you has been asked to bring a small amount of earth which was lovingly taken from your own home filled with love and hope and today it is hoped that as each of you place your earth into this plant pot, it will retain that love.

Once the pot is full Bride(name) & Groom(name) will plant the seedling that sits beside it, ready to grow and be nourished by the love of all of you.

I would now like to invite the parents and grandparent’s to come forward."

(Once they’ve finished)

"If everyone else could now please also come forward." (When complete and everyone has added their earth)

"Bride(name) & Groom(name) – your pot has now been filled with the love, hope and best wishes of all of your family and friends. It has been taken from their own lives, their own homes and now given to you to be the base of your future life together. As you now plant the seedling, let its growth and beauty be a constant reminder of the blending of your two lives and families and the love and support that they have for you as they watch you grow together."

(Couple finish planting the seedling and the officiant returns to concluding the ceremony)

This ritual is easy to do and very effective. As long as everyone participates its significance is beautiful and memorable. The wording can be changed and easily adapted to suit.

The Wedding Gurus

xxx

Marriage & the step parent dilemma

The society in which we live today is filled with wonderful blended families that come in all shapes and sizes.  We're not just talking about couples coming together from different cultural backgrounds, but also couples coming together, each with children of their own. (How could we forget The Brady Bunch - if only it was that easy). So many of the couples I see as a celebrant have families like this.

The joining of two families can be a really wonderful experience, but it would be remiss not to mention the fact that it can also be exceptionally difficult and fraught with potential disasters, particularly when combined with the stress of planning a wedding. Step parenting is never easy and we all know very well that planning a wedding can be overwhelming, even for the calmest of couples, but combining the two can see some couples in total despair.


To any of you who have successfully brought two families together while planning and executing an amazig wedding, we commend you. You truly deserve a round of applause.

BUT, for those of you (and I'm sure there are many) who are currently struggling with a suddenly much larger family, while trying to plan your big day and include children and step children, then we symapthise and are here to help.

In working with many couples in this situation I have put together a few ideas I wanted to share with you that may hopefully help you in finding ways to include children and step children and ease the stress of  any family tension that may be lingering.

I have found that finding ways to include and unite the family on such a public level really helps to strengthen the bond and puts the focus on inclusion and unity rather than exclusion and individuality.

Here are some ideas to help:

1. If the children are old enough allow them to act as junior bridesmaids/groomsmen. Asking them to stand beside you earns them a level of importance and respect that you may find helps them to feel apart of it all.

2. If you are each coming to the marriage with a couple of children it may not be practical to have them as attendant in the ceremony. I once did a ceremony for a couple where they each had 3 children and so they bought each of them a gold letter (the childs first initial) and as part of the ceremony each child was asked to come forward as the step parent placed the necklace on and gave them a kiss. All  the guests were crying and the children were so proud and pleased it was beautiful.

3. Include a unity ritual in your ceremony. A great way of making children feel included is by having a unifying ritual. A sand ceremony is a great example (see our sand ceremony for an example) I perform many sand ceremonies with families which usually requires a vase of coloured sand each different and representing the particular family member, They each then pour their sand into the large vase so the colours layer beautiful and then the vas eis then sealed. The glass can be engraved with the wedidng details or an engraved plaque put on the front. Once on display in the home the significance of the once single colours of sand that can now never be seperated again from the others is a constant reminder of the families bond.

4. If they are not wanting or confident enough to take part in the ceremony then give them a job. Ushering guests, handing out rose petals or bubbles. This will allow them to have a purpose on the day.

We really hope this helps and if you are still stuck feel free to contact us and we will be happy to help with more ideas.

The Wedding Gurus
xxx

Week 16: Stone Ceremony

Welcome to week 16 in our ’52 Rituals/Traditions in 52 Weeks’

This week we are looking at a traditional stone ceremony, although it is not commonly used in todays weddings it is an important part of Australian history. In early Australia many of their convicts could not afford to exchange rings therefore the stone ceremony was used to replace this. The couple would cast a stone into nearby river or ocean to signify their remaining together while the tides of time flowed over their lives. Please watch the video below for more of an indepth description and wording. 

Week 15 - The Seven Steps (Hindu)

Welcome to week 15 in our ’52 Rituals/Traditions in 52 Weeks’

A Hindu ceremony, in most cases is quite extravagant and beautiful. It incorporates many different rituals and traditions and is often filled with chanting and Sanskrit blessings that began in a time long ago. This ceremony is known as 'samskara' and in India, it can last days or even weeks.

A Hindu ceremony performed in the Western parts of the world are usually a little less extravagant and last at least two hours.

The central component of a Hindu wedding ceremony  is 'Saptapadi', also called the 'Seven Steps'.

In this ritual the bride’s sari is tied to the groom’s clothing (kurta), or a sari shawl may be draped from his shoulder to her sari. He then takes her, linking his pinky finger with hers and leads her in seven steps around the fire.

While this is taking place the priest or officiant chants the seven blessings or vows for a strong union. These are adapted her in English from the Hindu ceremony:

1. May this couple be blessed with an abundance of resources and comforts, and be helpful to one another in all ways.

2. May this couple be strong and complement one another.

3. May this couple be blessed with prosperity and riches on all levels.

4. May this couple be eternally happy.

5. May this couple be blessed with a happy family life.

6. May this couple live in perfect harmony… true to their personal values and their joint promises.

7. May this couple always be the best of friends.

With each step, they throw small bits of puffed rice into the fire, representing prosperity in their new life together. The action of walking around the fire indicates that they agree to these seven blessings. This is considered the most important part of the ceremony as it seals the bond forever.

A simple and easy way to adapt this into contemporary civil marriage ceremony is to light a traditional fire, or use a large candle or pot of fire that can be placed on a small table beside the bride and groom.

The bride and groom can then take seven steps around the table while the seven blessings are spoken in English.  They can still throw the rice into the fire if using a pot or something large enough.

You do not have to be Hindu to use a ritual such as the Seven Steps in your ceremony. Rituals and Traditions are becoming ever popular with couples all over the world and it is at times difficult to find a ritual that truly means something to you. Explore all of the options and don’t be afraid to incorporate something quite different and unique. It will definitely make your ceremony memorable. As long as you stay respectful to the culture the ritual belongs with the use of it, then it makes for a beautiful experience for all.

The Wedding Gurus xx

Week 14: The Coin / Arras Ceremony

Welcome to week 14 in our ’52 Rituals/Traditions in 52 Weeks’

The Arras or coin ceremony consists of 13 golden coins which are exchanged back and forth between the bride and groom to symbolize wealth and success within their marriage.

"The celebrant drops 13 pieces of coins (silver or gold) called arras into the Groom's waiting hands, who in turn drops it into the Bride's hands. The Bride then puts her hand above the Groom's then drops the arras into his hands again. The Groom allows the coins to then be dropped into a plate held by an attendant.

The metal tinkling of the coins being passed from one pair of hands to the other, is a distinctive reminder of the groom's promise to take care of his wife materially. The bride in return, by giving back the coins to his hands, convey that what they both earn become part of each other's. The trickling sound also signifies abundance and success in the couple's joint efforts."

Week 11 - A Korean Wedding Tradition

Welcome to Week 11 in our ’52 Rituals in 52 weeks’

In keeping with our promise of taking you around the world with these posts, this week we have decided to bring you something from Korea. While it will not always be practical for you to use some of these more specific cultural traditions in your own ceremony, we hope that seeing the efforts that some go to in using rituals in ceremony will inspire you to find one that suits you both as a couple or as a family and even perhaps create something different, starting your own family tradition that one day your grandchildren might carry on. All rituals and traditions started somewhere and with someone who found significance in the world around them.

Korean weddings are well known for their eccentric rituals and flair. Long ago it was custom for the couple to practise some long held rituals as part of their ceremony. The groom would ride a white pony all the way to the bride’s residence (regardless of the distance), carrying with him a white goose. The goose was, for Korean’s, a symbol of fertility and presentation of the goose to the waiting bride would ensure good luck when it came time to have a family.

In modern Koreathe Goose still holds the same sentiment, although wooden geese are now preferred given the difficulties of working with live animals!

Koreans are big on forms of representation when it comes to rituals in ceremony and also engage in a tradition whereby a pair of wooden ducks (representing the bride and the groom) are taken by the couple and placed in the home they will share after the marriage.

If the ducks are placed to face each other, then it represents that the couple are happy with each other and are on good terms, but if the ducks are faced outward, with their tails facing then it signals that perhaps there is unhappiness between them. (Pity the poor groom who comes home to find that his bride has faced them tail to tail!)

Let’s hope your ducks all face each other!

The Wedding Guru’s

xxxx

Wedding Theme Inspiration

Choosing your wedding setting and decor can be very overwhelming given the endless variety of ideas available to you. In our opinion the first step is to choose a theme, one that suits your personality and style.

 Things to consider when choosing a theme include:

-    Colour - ( ie black and white or purple and silver). Our favourites are soft tones such as ivory, champagne or white with a bold splash of colour such as purple, pink or black to be the most appropriate choice if you are planning for a chic romantic setting. Try to stick to one or two colours to be as effective as possible as more colours mixed in can begin to look a little out of place.

-    Style – Again base this on your personalities. Are you characters of elegance?,  or are you a couple who enjoy the beach, or perhaps lovers of the renaissance or the vintage and antique. Your chosen style can also be arranged around the season of your wedding, if it is an autumn wedding you might like to find an outdoor location amongst the orange of the trees or if in summer, a beautiful beach wedding might be the way to go.

-    Budget – Your theme may be restricted by your budget. Be realistic from early on in the planning stages, remember you don’t have to spend thousands of dollars to have a beautiful wedding setting and there are plenty of amazing DIY options available to you. There would be no point in planning a setting filled with arches and vases of lush fresh flowers, crystal candelabras, chandeliers and tea light candles suspended from the ceiling if your budget doesn’t allow. There would be nothing worse than the feeling of having to change your setting plans at the last minute because you have run out of money to pay the florist or hire company.  

Once your theme has been chosen this will guide you in selecting your invitations, wedding and bridesmaid dresses, beautiful centrepieces, bonbonnieres and even food and beverage choices.

To get you started in this thought process we have compiled our top 10 wedding setting pictures as posted by brides and grooms from all over, which we believe radiate romantic elegance and beauty.

 We hope this inspires you towards creating the wedding of your dreams. If you would like to run any ideas past us or if you have a beautiful wedding setting you would like to share please send it in to theweddinggurus@live.com.au for your chance to have your question, idea or picture featured on our page.

The Wedding Guru's

xxxx

Please note: These settings have been compiled from numerous sources including Facebook posts and other web pages. These photographs are not the property of The Wedding Guru's. If you would like any information on the owner of a particular photograph we would be happy to assist.

52 Rituals/Traditions - Announcement

Over the next 5 weeks we are going to be doing something a little different in our ‘52 Rituals/Traditions in 52 Weeks’.

Our next 5 posts will be some lesser known and more culturally diverse rituals from all over the world.

Some of these are century old customs and others are modern versions of long standing cultural traditions.

Many you may not have heard of before, but they are gorgeous and rich in their depth and sentiment and we really wanted to explore some of these ideas despite the fact that they may be a little more ‘out there’ than many would normally consider.

Remember, any tradition or custom can be modified to suit your particular use for it, however it is always a good idea to do your best to keep enough of the original meaning so as to be respectful to the culture to which it belongs. Rituals mean a great deal to those who practise them so we should always be mindful of this.

We are really looking forward to bringing you some really different ideas over the coming weeks and hope that you will join us in exploring some fun ideas.

The Wedding Guru’s

Week 9 - Unity Candle Lighting Ceremony

Welcome to week 9 of our '52 traditions / rituals in 52 week' this week we are bringing to you a demonstration of a 'Unity Candle Lighting Ceremony'. Our resident celebrant blogger susan considers it to be one of the most popular ceremonies she performs.

Step by Step Guide:

The unity candle ceremony is seen more and more frequently throughout the weddings of today. The ceremony symbolizes the pledge of unity between the bride and groom and the merging of two families.

As a general rule there are 3 candles required to perform a unity candle ceremony which consist of 1 large centre candle and 2 slim (or taper) candles. The mothers of the bride and groom may light the 2 taper candles the bride and groom then take these candles and proceed to light the single large candle representing their two lives and two families uniting as one.

The two single candles may then be blown out to represent the extinguishing of their single lives, or more popular today may be kept alit to symbolize although united through marriage their individualism is still present in their lives.

Video Demonstration:

Wording Example:

The lighting of these family candles symbolise __ and __ separate lives and pasts before today (bride and grooms mums light the candles). Through the love, support, wisdom and guidance they have both received from their families, they are here today to join their lives as one.

__ and __, with the light from your family candles, unite the two flames into one (bride and groom light centre candles). The unity of this flame symbolises the union of your families and your separate lives, into a commitment made in love and kept in faith. The two of you now have a fire that represents love, understanding and the future. It will give you warmth and happiness through even the darkest times. This new fire represents a new beginning, a new life and a new family.

The Wedding Guru's
xxxxx

Beautiful Bride & Groom Vows

When we at the Wedding Guru’s read these vows we were more than a little moved and so we wanted to share them with you. While not all of us have the gift of being able to write and explain ourselves so beautifully and poetically, what we can take from others who have absolutely put their hearts out there and created some beautiful vows, is that it gives the rest of us who struggle to explain our feelings a place to start.

I want to tell you a little about the couple who wrote these vows so that you can see the words from the perspective that they were written.

The bride, (known as Natalia) is a very accomplished professional who, while establishing her career has travelled the world and raised 3 children, a daughter and then twins on her own. When she met the groom (known as Graham) he himself had been through some of his own difficult times and was the father to four children two of whom were in their late teems and the other two just toddlers. Together they fell in love with not just each other, but all the things that they each brought to the relationship and they worked long and hard to make sure that on their wedding day, they each were able to express that love and gratitude in their vows: We hope you enjoy them as we did, they are a little long but far too good to cut down!

The Wedding Guru’s

xxxx

Groom’s vows

Natalia. Shall I compare you to a summer's day? No.

You are far more lovely and more constant
December breeze undressing jacarandas
And summer’s warm breadth? Too narrow.
Occasionally the sun flares too hot
Or retreats before floating mists
Every waxing beauty sometimes will wane
By chance or helped by Nature’s guiding hand
But your long endless summer shall never cool
Never be without your beauty within
Nor will heartbeats end deny your gift to me
When eighty winters besiege your brow,
Furrow your beauty,
I shall marvel in you
Still delight in your bounty.
I enter our union
Expectant of loving fully and heartily
Without fear of giving quarter
Sharing the marriage with those we love and care for.
A beacon to our children
Of commitment and committing
Perfectly balanced loving
Without pedestals.
Just eye to eye, cheek to jowl, back to back.
Forever.
Half a lifetime too great an expanse to have traversed
To alight at your doorstep
So now cast aside your clocks.
Set your compass true.
Aboard for the ride of our life.
And so it is.
Just like you said it would be.”

 Bride’s Vows

Graham, you are my home, my one safe place. I fell in love with you for so many reasons, the way your eyes smile when you are happy or cheeky, your commitment to your children and those you love, your eternal optimism, your intelligence, strength and your outlook on life.

Graham, you, more than anyone, know my vulnerabilities, insecurities, frailties, and failings, yet you never take advantage, and love me all the more. You inspire, challenge, support  and nurture me. You believe in me when my own belief wavers and I am beset with self doubt. You find in me qualities that I did not trust or believe were there. Your love is unconditional, without reservation, constant, yet demanding, forthright and bold . Your love for my children and commitment to their growth and development as good, honourable, ethical, courageous and confident young people could be no greater if they were your own

What can I say to you that I haven’t already said, and what can I give you that I haven’t already given? Everything that is the essence of me belonged to you long before this. And it shall be yours, long after this, and for always.

I give you not the "spring of my life" but the languid late summer and the autumn, brisk and vibrant. Our life together  inextricably entwines our 7 beautiful children, our large circle of friends
and our loving families. We will cherish the memories of our individual pasts and build our new life together.

Let me be the shoulder you lean on, the rock on which you rest. With you I will walk the path we have chosen and together we will dream. We may stumble and  we may falter, but we will always be there for each other.

Tonight Graham, I join my life to yours. The decision to commit to share my life with you is one I make joyfully, easily and with full confidence in our love; secure in the knowledge that you are my best friend, confidant, partner in life, and my one true love. Time may pass, fortune may smile, trials may come; but no matter what we may encounter, I know we do it together, stronger for loving each other.”